Today is April 25th, 2017, and in about fifteen minutes, the clock will strike twelve and I will be twenty. Twenty. God damn, I have lived and breathed for two decades. Damn, time does fly fast. I don’t know what I am typing or where I am going with this, but I somehow want to capture this moment.
So where do I start? 19 was a rollercoaster of a year. To put it in a nutshell it was bat shit crazy. I experienced and felt so many things. Heartbreaks, breakdowns, happiness, love, paradigm shifts. Life has been crazy. But it is somewhat calm now. I am in a good place. It’s been a while since I have been so at peace with myself. Don’t get me wrong there are still internal battles which I struggle with on a day to day basis, but such is life and everyone has their own demons which they fight with on a regular.
I would like to start off by stating all the important things that happened to me while I was 19 that forever changed the way I was:
- My parents had a messy separation
- I dropped out of University without telling my parents
- I started attending George Brown College for Graphic Design
- I became a vegetarian and found out about the devastating impact animal agriculture has on our planet
- I found out how cruel and fucked up the meat and dairy industry is
- I finally talked to someone professional about my depression (took you long enough dumbass)
- Oh yeah did a Social Media Internship and got a taste of the real world.
- I watched Cowspiracy and The Gary Yourofsky Speech
All these events significantly shaped me, for better and for worse. So here goes, 20 things I learned by age 20:
- Love is hard and complicated, it takes a lot of effort to make relationships work. But if it is meant to be, it shouldn’t be so hard.
- Everyone deserves a second chance.
- You are young and beautiful, don’t be scared to flaunt that shit ;)
- Mental health is more important than your grades/job.
- Just because someone is your family does not mean that they must support you.
- People care about you, and you are not alone. Trust me there is one person out there who will listen to you and be devastated if you leave this planet.
- Carbs are not bad for you.
- Exercise will make you happy.
- Pursue what you love, don’t give two shits about what your parents think, or what society thinks. Have that goal in your mind and chase it with all the might you’ve got.
- You change and so will your friends.
- It’s completely okay to not have life figured out (trust me no one really does).
- Fake it till you make it.
- Minimalism is beautiful. Living with less is beautiful. Stuff is over rated.
- Boys are complicated, dating is complicated, and love is complicated. How the fuck does one do that shit anyways???
- Life is beautiful and worth living. There is so much to see, so much to do and so much to accomplish.
- I want to be my own boss.
- No one is going to give you anything, so stop being lazy and get to work. Your goals are not going to accomplish themselve.
- Animal agriculture is responsible for 18 percent of greenhouse gas emissions, more than the combined exhaust from all transportation.
- Animals are not ours to eat, wear, experiment on, use for entertainment, or abuse in any way.
- The perception of happiness is skewered by information given by our consumerist society. Happiness is not about smiling all the time, it’s not about having that material possession or that person you really like. But rather it is how you handle struggles and overcome struggles and continue to shine through. Cause like anger, and sadness happiness is just an emotion. You need to be okay with yourself and stop chasing this happily ever after that people keep talking about. Cause happily ever after’s don't exist, and that is the beauty of life.
As J Cole stated, “there is beauty in the struggle ugliness in the success.”
Oh shoot, will you look at that??? 12:15. I am now officially twenty. Does that mean I have to start adulting now? How does one even do that? Its been a wild ride. I wonder how my 20s will be. I am excited to see and find out. I really need to finish my website and create some sort of blog thing. God dammit so much to do. Alright, Sumayyah you made it. Look how far you have come in life, keep it up. I am proud of you. If you are reading this from the future, I really hope you made your dreams come true, and you still have a passion for living.
(I want cake. Not any cake. I want birthday cake.)